Not only do we provide a tasteful adult environment; bringing people together for love, friendship, learning, support, and camaraderie The practice of Polyamory can be as unique as each of us are. PMM supports all styles, all people.

Creating a profile can be a daunting task. Especially one where you are seeking either multiple connections or you are already partnered and looking for another connection. Consider answering these questions when making a profile on PolyMatchMaker. Specify why you are interesting.

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Detail your own personal beliefs in ethical non-monogamy, poly, etc. List what you are going to bring to the table and offering.

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Be forthcoming about your end goal be it FWB, relationship, an encounter, or all of the above. Using these types of words means you are not flexible. Within what you are looking for: Think about and list positives over negatives but be brutally honest about what you will not accept from a potential partner. Have date nights instead of just flopping in front of the TV together and make the buildup to those nights as much a part of the event as the date itself. Charles and I never did the couple-y, lounge around in unflattering clothes part -- and it made each meeting spark.

I've always felt like past boyfriends compared me to other women. Some of them directly pointed out attractive women who were thinner, younger or, in one case, more innocent-acting than me. Others did not, but I still assumed they were at risk whenever a thinner, younger, more attractive, different woman was around.

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Dating Charles meant I had to reconcile myself to being one of many, but I also discovered that did nothing to lessen my appeal. I stopped resenting other women or seeing them as competition, because I wasn't going to lose what I had if he was with them, too. As a result, I'm much more at ease with other women than I was before, which is a good thing for every aspect of my life, not just my current relationship.

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When I first got involved with Charles, he outlined the small print. He would never leave his wife. He would only stay over by pre-arrangement. His wife would know about me she is just as active in the poly world as he is , and he didn't think he could be in love with two people at the same time. With my expectations managed, I didn't run into brick walls trying to make the relationship something it wasn't.

I was free to enjoy all the things it did provide. Friendship, support, great sex, an emotional connection, but not "love.

In my new relationship, the scope of my expectations is wider and deeper, but one thing I know will never happen is living in the same place. I'm not secretly hoping he'll change his mind the more he falls in love, which means not storing up disappointment for the future.

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Poly relationships have more ebb and flow and more overlap. Things are more likely to develop into something else than to end. Charles is friends with all his previous lovers. I've always hated mine in the end or, at the very minimum, felt a lack of interest bordering on hate. But Charles and I haven't had any breakup drama to go through — merely an adjustment.

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And he's as delighted for me as I am grateful to him for clearing my head of the bad relationship habits monogamy led me into. No more jealousy or competitiveness, no hiding my feelings about issues in case my boyfriend just agrees with me and ends it. I'm not going to allow complacency and dependency to creep in. She writes about sex, and dating, blogs at www. Ads are currently disabled. Please sign in with Facebook or Google below: If you have an older Salon account, please enter your username and password below: